
A strange unnatural mist has began to appear in key areas all over the globe. Areas afflicted with this mist lose contact to the outside world. This alarming news is something the American President (Kevin Sorbo - Devil's Knight, Without a Body) bizarrely has only just been informed of - informed that key cities around the world have already gone dark, and that many areas in the US are now in the process of being lost!
Frank is the owner of a successful business, and happens to be hosting a large dinner party at his mansion when the mist appears. With reports on the TV stating to stay inside away from the mist, Frank invites his guests to use his newly constructed bunker, to stay there until the all-clear is given from the government. This might be a too little too late step for the guests though, as it becomes clear that as well as the mist, some sort of monster has infiltrated the grounds of Frank's property.
There were pacing issues here, and some less than great set-design. With the former, there was barely much of a story here at all. Characters go out of their way to get in danger, and the resulting finale felt rushed through. High action and high stakes for sure, but this finale felt uncomfortably constrained in a ten minute burst. It wasn't an abrupt ending, but ended soon enough that a block of text appears on screen to explain what happened afterwards.
The bunker door for the bunker played a key role in the story, yet the door itself looked pretty wobbly, with the two doors that make up it never really coming together and closing properly. Didn't seem very effective for a supposedly tough door. The mist was overused, though only in the sense that every time it appeared it made everything look the same misty white, obscuring the environments and making it hard to make much out. The bunker interior did look fantastic however, a highlight of the locations used in the movie.
Alien Storm may have been a bit overly ambitious, but I enjoyed it. There was a streak of nihilism that made for an interesting feel and vibe. There were bound to be some less than amazing acting in the large cast, but I enjoyed the characters, regardless of how simple they were. There were parts of this that reminded me of the zombie sub-genre of horror, never a bad thing at all to discover. Alien Storm was released on 21st July and is available to rent or buy on Apple TV and Amazon Prime Video.
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I might be mistaken, but I believe this novel is a spiritual sequel to The Revengist series; a comedy crime trilogy. The GO Team are a secretive Canadian elite special squad who carry out dangerous missions around the world that few others would be able to complete. Set in the 1980s, the once powerful GO Team is now a shadow of its former self, with the outfit only having three agents to its name. Hunglo is the Asian kung-fu expert, Brutal Suzy is an expert sniper, while Doll-Face (Jessica) is the newest member and an all rounder. During a routine mission, these agents discover America's flashy and non-secret version of GO Team, their one named Uncle Sam Squad, soon becomes known worldwide for always getting the job done with minimal casualties. With Uncle Sam Squad beating GO Team to their every mission, the Canadian outfit get closed down, seen as no longer needed. Desperate to stay relevant, the team go rogue, certain if they carry out one last mission, that their use to the world will be recognised.
First off, GO Team is a great novel. The humour is transferred here effortlessly, and it very rarely misses. To be honest, I came here for more of Frank Malone. This detective character may be a clone of Police Squad's Frank Drebin, but I adore the character and his matter of fact literal view of the world. Sadly for me, Frank barely features here. Mentioned in passing, he only makes on appearance for a third of a single chapter. He was on glorious form when he did appear, and the rest of the book was so entertaining that his mild role wasn't an issue.
The book's title suggests a double header, but Bitter Rivals and African Assault flow together much more smoothly than that. The only real link between the two are the chapters dedicated to sadistic dictator Mbunga, demonstrating how cartoonishly evil he is. For all the breezy larger than life characters, there are some strong moments of darkness, including a few scenes of torture and plenty of harsh threats. Though, mostly, the novel runs more comedic than anything else.
GO Team felt like action figures brought to life upon the pages. Each character has a strong personality and iconic look. This vibe was purposeful, with the story never trying to take itself super seriously. One amusing mid-book part has GO Team trying to infiltrate Uncle Sam Squad's huge and impractical mobile fortress. This whole part screamed M.A.S.K to me (something I loved as a child), especially with the location of a petrol station named Boulder Hill. As a child I had the M.A.S.K base, of course set at a petrol station with that same name. That whole part of the book had GO Team at its best, funny, exciting, and unique in equal measure.
The protagonists of the novel reminded me a bit of the characters from Archer. Not so much incompetent, as competent, but constantly finding themselves in ridiculous situations. They were a likeable bunch, so were fun to follow around.
You may well wonder what a review of a comedy action novel is doing on a horror blog. Initially, my excuse was that the novel includes Frank Malone; a character who has feature in comedy horror novels previously. For purists however, there is horror in a form that was very close to my heart, that appeared in the closing sections, but which I won't speak of for fear of spoilers. I enjoyed GO Team Agents of C.A.N.U.C.K "Bitter Rivals/African Assault". Sure, the portrayal of the African characters all being prone to superstition did feel a bit antiquated, but mostly the novel was forever on point. Maybe the 'African Assault' part of the novel could have been extended slightly, to feel less like a fever dream (taking place over the back third of the novel), but overall, this was a wonderful blend of comedy and action.
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Lars (Grammer), suffering amnesia, finds himself wandering a strange desert. All he can remember is his name, and that he had recently escaped from a prison based on an alien prison planet. The man has the clothes on his back, and an A.I controlled rifle, which is rapidly losing power. Lars' journey sees him travel down a narrow ravine, which results in him somehow ending up in modern day California. In a library, Lars discovers that he may actually just be a character from a sci-fi novel, and decides to track down the author of the novel in order to try and discover the truth of who he actually is.
For the first ten to fifteen minutes, this looked like it would just be a very cheaply made sci-fi B-movie. I thought to myself that Grammer must have fallen on hard times to have agreed to star in this. Whether that is the case or not, this turned out to be a more intelligent film than first impressions had suggested. It is relatively early on when Lars finds himself on Earth, but much longer before he realises this fact. It was somewhat amusing looking at Earth technology through an alien lens. Taking the form of such moments as Lars believing homes to be prison cells, and being mystified when he attempts to use a PC.
The sci-fi plot soon transitions into a more arthouse look at what it means to be alive and having freewill. This becomes more a visual essay, and while light on action, there are some interesting ideas to be discovered here, but it is a slow paced film.
The majority of the movie has Lars on his own. There are a handful of side characters, but just the one felt like they were really integral to the story playing out. This isn't something that takes itself super seriously - the talking gun for example is patently ridiculous, while Lars continuing confusion when dealing with modern day Earth is always exaggerated. His wanderings through desert and later California is a lonely and isolating trek, his journey constantly narrated by David Clennon, who starred in the 1987 sci-fi movie tangential prequel; The Trouble With Dick. All the philosophical musings on the nature of man made for an interesting subject, but the story suffered as a result. It increasingly felt more abstract, culminating in an open ended finale, resolving this somewhat, without too much really happening.
Less a film and more a study into the nature of humanity, Lars Shrike Walks the Night soon loses its sci-fi disguise. Grammer was great in his unexpected role, but the slow pace and more artsy feel meant that while the dialogue might have had merit, what actually happens wasn't quite as exciting. Lars Shrike Walks the Night came to VOD on July 24th.
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Titular track 'Home' opens up the EP. Four minutes of high energy pop punk which reminded me of the style of B*tch Alert. Next is 'Schizophrenia', an early contender for best track. This features three minutes of mildly snarling singing with a heavy drum beat that was literal music to the ears. Giving a bit of a Courtney Love sound is middle track 'Where Do You Go?', another good one, and another thundering drum beat. Penultimate track 'Fade' continues the blistering punk rock sound, until 'Tonight' closes out the EP. At five minutes, this last track did wear out its welcome somewhat due to the repetitive nature of it.
Trivia's debut EP Home was a good listen, with the three tracks in the middle especially good to hear. I enjoyed it, and at 20 minutes was a perfect length all in all. Trivia have recently been picked up by Serial Bowl Records who are releasing the EP as a CD.
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Rebecca (Willa Holland - Gossip Girl, Straw Dogs), is a new mortuary assistant who has recently completed her training, allowing her to work unsupervised. She is also a recovering drug addict who has made it to one year free, important as it gives the character a dark backstory. Her creepy boss, Raymond (Paul Sparks - House of Cards, Thoroughbreds) had told her she would never be needed in the mortuary at night, but one dark and stormy evening he contacts her, telling her he is out of town, so she is needed to deal with some bodies that have been delivered there. Things begin fine, but then Rebecca begins to experience strange goings on. Power fluctuations, ringing phones and doors being knocked on, but no-one being there, and hallucinations of a manically grinning white humanoid. It isn't much later that she discovers she has become possessed by a demonic entity that had been residing in one of the corpses she had been working on, and now it is feeding off of her trauma to try and fully take control of the woman. Luckily for her, Raymond is all too aware of this risk of the job, and he has knowledge of how to deal with the situation. He is also someone looking to save his own skin, and so, rather than assist in person, he instead locks Rebecca in the mortuary and gives her some obtuse instructions via the phone.
Watching this, I hoped it would be doing something similar to the excellent The Autopsy of Jane Doe. Setting wise and situation wise those two films were quite similar. This film mostly takes place over a single night, with Rebecca all alone doing her best to adapt and survive to the hell she has found herself in. The hallucinations she experiences have consequence for her outside of being scary, as these hallucinations are able to physically hurt her. She is visited by these deadite style imitations of people who were/are close to her, with their torment revolving around an incident in Rebecca's past that the film keeps flashbacking to. In the present, Raymond does his best to bring both our protagonist and the viewer up to speed on the lore of the film world. I thought Sparks was great in his role, an interesting character who comes across as neutral rather than good or evil. The help he offers is sincere and legitimate, but he is also someone that doesn't want to put himself at unnecessary risk.
Her journey has her shunted through a series of hallucinations and dream sequences heaped on top of each other, transporting her through time and space. This created a dreamlike feel where I could never be too sure what was really happening and what was imagined, which caused the film's stakes to be drastically lowered. It is hard to fear for the safety of a protagonist when a lot of what she is facing may all be in her head.
The Mortuary Assistant had good atmosphere to it, but ultimately was never scary. The tendency to introduce moments of surprise terror with a musical intro led to those parts always falling flat. The confusing story led to moments when I wasn't exactly sure what Rebecca was trying to achieve, nor how she knew to do it. Within this, there are a few scenes of intense action, which were always fun to watch. The special effects were decent enough, and the make-up work on the various corpses looked neat. The prime antagonist here wasn't that iconic looking, appearing like no end of similar looking creatures in multitudes of short horror films. I do appreciate he was based on the creature from the video game, so not like there was any wiggle room to change its look.
I liked The Mortuary Assistant but I didn't love it. It will be interesting to play the video game and see if this movie retroactively improves or worsens the experience. There was atmosphere in spades here, but with a confusing story and a lack of scares, that atmosphere was squandered. Shudder original The Mortuary Assistant came to Blu-ray and DVD on 20th July thanks to Acorn Media International.
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Coming out on July 28th is Cleopatra Venom's new horror film - The Withering, on Digital video. The film concerns an old woman with terminal cancer. This lady becomes obsessed with a strange amulet she gets a hold of. This device siphons the life force of others in her town, keeping her fit and healthy. The more she uses this however, the more sick the rest of the town become, as she becomes younger and stronger, the town begins to die, and is up to the woman's sister to come to the town's aid and destroy the device.

John (Brett Geddes) is a serial killer. He likes to abduct young women, strip them naked and then lock them up in his basement, where he forces them to act as if they were a dog for his perverse sexual pleasure. Eventually, he will get bored of them/kill them in a fit of rage, and the cycle begins anew. Surprisingly, this is something that his loving wife, Charlie (Natasha Calis) is all too aware of. While she doesn't like her husband doing this, she still supports him, even going as far as to help him to dispose of the bodies. This unique hobby of John's is causing friction in the marriage however, Charlie getting jealous of the attention he gives his victims. After John promises to give up the abductions (to instead focus on his passion for pottery), Charlie is overjoyed. This leads to a chain of events where the roles get inadvertently reversed, with Charlie discovering she too has a passion for killing.
So, as can be inferred, the protagonists here are very much anti-heroes. Despite being a monster, there is something almost innocent to John. Sure he is sick and depraved, but he also very much loves his wife, and the joy he begins to get from making basic pottery was a bit endearing on screen. Charlie wasn't quite as innocent, having no moral issue to John's killings, no remorse for the victims, and only opposed to it for selfish reasons - she was not a good person.
The characters here are all of the small town type, and many share a history, having grown up together. You have a former school bully, now turned detective; Dale (Dylan Taylor - Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City) with his terrible attitude to life, and Mia (Rachel Boyd) - the flirty teenage daughter of a client that groundskeeper John works for, who acts as a kind of Lolita type character. This later acts as a constant temptation for John, with it alluded to that he likes young girls. To be fair to him, the scenes featuring him and Mia were some of the most amusing, with them having more of a friendly rivalry feel than disturbing love interest vibe. Again, John isn't a good person, but his restraint and patience for Mia was handled well. Over the course of the movie, John grows and changes as a person, while in contrast, Charlie seems to devolve into the secret monster she always was.
You would think with people dropping like flies around the couple that they would become suspects, but ineffective local law enforcement is the excuse given for why that isn't the case. This covered up some leaps in logic, but there are still some holes to be found if you examine the plot a little too closely.
There is a kill count, and it is varied enough to entertain. Strangulation, stabbings, and plenty of victim and attacker scenes of them rolling around the floor fighting each other. Blood looked good, and make-up wasn't half bad either.
The locations chosen are suitably grimy, especially the home of the depraved couple which was a bit decrepit looking.
'Sick Puppy' applies to a lot of things here, obviously, the subject matter of John making his victims act like animals, and also, again obviously, reflected in the characters of John and Charlie. There is constant black humour that does work well on occasion. I thought the running joke of just how much John is into his terrible pottery was a good bit. The story was fine, with protagonists as terrible as these ones, I did wonder how the story would be wrapped up, I was pleased with the path this one took, was at once fitting, and also channelling some of that dark humour.
Sick Puppy was a twisted horror featuring a whole bunch of flawed and feral characters. A decent spin on a typical serial killer thriller, but without a character to care about, I left my viewing of this not really fussed about it either way. Sick Puppy is due to be released via High Fliers Films in the fourth quarter of this year.
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There have been a lot of disappearances in and around the rural city of Meadville (that the end credits are very excited to state is a real place), and Carrie (Rainey Qualley - Ocean's Eight) has decided to write a book about this, hoping to be successful enough that she will be able to afford to move somewhere better. She is looking at the situation from the perspective of local legend, with many people believing human/pig hybrids live up in a remote area known as Pig Hill and they are responsible for the missing people. Of course, these investigations get the girl closer to the the truth than she ever realised she would.
Things do make more sense later on, but I was unprepared for the commitment to treating the silly subject seriously. As a protagonist, I really liked Carrie. She had a sleep-walking type of feel throughout Pig Hill that blended well with its more ethereal and hallucinogenic moments. It is rare to get a lead who is the movie's scene-stealer, but that was the case here. Qualley made each scene she appeared in better, purely by her being there. Not that she had too much competition, as a lot of the rest of the cast didn't seem as well...cast. Shane West (Gotham) plays Carrie's new love interest; Andy; a man with not one, but two tragic backstories to his name. He has such an earnest face and says his lines in such a matter of fact world weary resigned way that every word that came out of his mouth sounded fake. I could not take this character seriously, making for a character I did not care for at all. Better was Carrie's creepy brother, Chris (Shiloh Fernandez - Evil Dead), he has a real skill at oozing off-putting, too protective vibes in his relationship with his adored sibling. Back on the flipside there is Andy's best friend; a barman who is forced to have near enough his every line of dialogue come across as comedic, and out of place.
There are many dream sequences, lots of reality bending, and Carrie frequently hallucinates the pig man in various places watching her - this all combines to make you feel something more supernatural may be going on. There was a trippy vibe to much of the film, with scenes bleeding into each other enough that you occasionally question if what you are seeing is real or part of a dream sequence. The occasional disorientating scene transition adds to the movie's default dream-like feel. When the story is eventually displayed in all its truth, it adds a different perspective to earlier scenes - certainly a grim subject matter! Gave me slight vibes of the Black Mirror episode 'Loch Henry'. I did really like where the film ended up going.
If you came to Pig Hill hoping for pig people, then sure, you will find them here, at least in some form. You will also get scenes of gore, sexual assault, and one over the top birth scene, invoking old school Peter Jackson gore-fests. I like that this tried to go somewhere unexpected with its story, and with good cinematography, editing effects and a good look, this horror wasn't terrible. Pig Hill is due out in the forth quarter this year, thanks to High Fliers Films.
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Back in May, indie horror film Susurrus was released by Ten-Headed Skeleton, who also wrote, directed and produced it. The subject matter for this movie was the 'Backrooms', something that I have only recently become aware of, and have found it all a fascinating place for horror. The synopsis has a group of woman who all find themselves trapped in the endless backrooms, all having been transported there when walking through doorways. The press release mentions both Cube and The Twilight Zone episode 'Five Characters in Search of an Exit', so of course that sounded appealing. Susurrus is available to watch online now.

The intro (bizarrely told via a puppet show), introduces us to the world of Birdcall. An avian disease has made the jump to humans, the disease causing victims to first rot, before making them become homicidally violent, and then finally mutating them into a new form. Scientist Jon (Sam Beaton) and his wife, Rosie (Vassiliki Gicopoulos) have travelled to a remote cabin. Rosie believes it is due to her insulting a superior of Jon's back at the facility that they have been sent away from the main facility, but unknown to her, Jon is infected, and has travelled to the cabin in order to test out a cure he has been working on.
There were a mix of styles here that meant at points the short didn't flow too smoothly. I liked the weird intro section, an easy and effective way to bring viewers up to speed on the film world. The whole short takes place inside the cabin location, the unnerving sounds outside indicating they are trapped here. The two characters are the focus of this short, and at times they revert to found footage moments where they leave video diaries. Jon was very arrogant, and him and Rosie's marriage is explored via dialogue indicating she is with him and his people for protection, making her initially quite a submissive character.
The plot goes as expected, some nice make-up to sell Jon's obviously increasingly rotting body. The constant monster calls from outside added atmosphere, though some of the sound effects did sound a little generic. The cabin was a decent location, but the side plots of what Jon and Rosie are doing did feel a little sporadic.
Birdcall does a lot with a little, much of the horror implied rather than shown. The core-story wasn't something unique, though the set-up made for a little change. This was a good enough entry in this type of single location infection horror. Birdcall has its world premiere at the Fantasia International Film Festival as part of the Official Selection of the Weekend Fantastique du Cinéma Québécois on July 31st.
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Natalie (Kaiti Wallen - Final Recovery, Beneath Us All) is found one day lost and confused in the woods. It turns out she is the same person who was abducted outside her home as a child fifteen years previously. Unfortunately for her, she has lost her memory, and so is unable to help the police with finding where she had been and who she had been with all that time. Through a series of flashbacks, we see her under the care of a paranoid man claiming to be her real father (Harley Wallen). He has convinced Natalie that Calvin (Jerry Hayes - Final Recovery, Beneath Us All), the man she thought to be her actual father, is evil and has sent people out into the world to find and abduct her. In the present, unable to recall much more than fragments of memory, Natalie struggles to identify what is fact and what is fiction.
The film follows a back and forth structure between past and present over its near 100 minute runtime. The actress playing young Natalie (Emilia Wallen - Beneath Us All) was excellent in her role; a curious and kind child who was easy to like. Surprisingly, the abductor also presented himself well for the most part. Thankfully, this man believes himself to be the girl's father, and so there is no sexual or physical threat from him. The moments of action with him were effective, though the use of a red tint to indicate when he has lost control was an odd choice. I didn't like the present day Natalie. I get she is troubled and upset, but the permanent scowl on her face like she is smelling something bad, didn't endear me to the character.
I may not have been too keen on the protagonist in present day, but I was still very interested to piece together the pieces of the puzzle that made up the story, to see where things would end up. Sadly however, Fathers fizzles out rather than sticks the landing. It isn't an exaggeration to say the film literally cuts to credits mid-flow, leaving unresolved plot lines and a feeling of deep dissatisfaction. When seeing this, I exclaimed out loud "What the Hell!?", such was my surprise at the abrupt finish.
I loved the back and forth between past and present, how clues as to what might be going on are drip-fed to the viewer. Scenes of peril were few and far between, but they worked and looked effective (outside of the red tint). A minimal use of special effects, but they did the job adequately. More than anything, it was the story that kept me hooked, even if it did lead to that unfortunate end. Fathers was a decent thriller, that was held back from being an essential watch due to a couple of smallish issues.
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Deadlocked: Dad of the Dead is a horror-comedy from writer/director Casey Jackson, to stream exclusively on Screamify from July 1st. Taking place entirely in a public restroom (bringing to mind Stalled), this 84 minute movie has an accountant and his daughter trapped in the place, alongside a bunch of strangers, after a zombie outbreak occurs.
Alien Storm (not the classic Megadrive/Genesis video game)is debuting on July 21st, coming from Mahal Empire. The film is about a rich businessman who is forced to flee, along with his guests, into his high-tech secret bunker when a strange fog spreads over his estate. They soon find they are not alone, with an alien presence inside the compound.


The sublime five minute prologue introduces you to the all powerful organisation of 'Turnbuckle & Bone'. A montage presentation likens this secret society to the Illuminati, with the group controlling the world fate of wrestling from behind the scenes, with the power to make or break wrestling careers. The film itself is set out as showing the rigorous initiation process that new members must partake in. It does this by following small time wrestler, Power Punch (real life wrestler Vinny Pacifico), someone who is a potential new member, who has travelled to the secret headquarters to get a chance to make it into the wrestling big leagues.
This film had a very cool aesthetic to it. The editing throughout was near perfect. If my review had been based purely on that five minute introduction, then my final score would have been 10/10. Amazingly edited and produced, with perfect sound design. Off topic, I have recently been playing video game Marathon, and the editing style here really reminded me of the style from that game. There is a pirate TV gonzo feel, combined with a nightmarish mash-up of perfectly chosen moments and images.
The film is narrated by an on-screen narrator, who like everyone else in the film, wears a simple and somehow unsettling white paper-maché type mask. With his clipped posh British voice, he gives a matter of fact feel to what he says. It is hard to properly explain what watching this arthouse movie felt like, it gave me a vibe of the in-game episodes that play on TVs throughout Alan Wake. Voice work is often distorted heavily, with key lines of dialogue also appearing in bold on screen. There was a feel of a video game to much of this, flashback sequences and examples of the rise to making it big in wrestling represented by pixel art animations. When the protagonist, Power Punch appears, he even gets his own screen showing his stats.
There were two main mini-stories going on within the instructional. The bigger of these is Power Punch being so eager to join the society that he signs the leader; Mr Reset's (Kodzewski) contract without really considering that the small print states his wife will be taken as collateral should he underperform!
The smaller story concerns a wrestler who goes by the name 'That Dude' who struggles with playing a heel role, when in real life he is a good person. He is contrasted against Ryzin (Rob Ryzin), a heel who delights in his role of chaos. Both try to give fables about the psychological and physical hardships of being a professional wrestler.
Both of those sections culminated in wrestling matches, like the rest of the film, much of this is shot in black and white. The matches are exciting and it is obvious the wrestlers know how to actually wrestle. With everyone wearing those creepy expressionless masks, and that twisted ending, there was a definite horror vibe here, though mostly it stays as darkly surreal. At just over an hour long it effectively teaches its lesson. The kinetic fast paced editing and super-cool feeling unhinged style did get a tiny bit exhausting at times. Still, there really is nothing else like this, a wonderfully bananas horror arthouse that, as mentioned throughout this review, really did have some amazing production to it. Mr. Reset and The Society of Turnbuckle & Bone is available now on Apple TV, Google Play, and YouTube TV.
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The sixteen minute EP begins with 'Our Voices At The Bottom Of The Ocean', which more than anything made me think of a tune set during a summery montage. screaming peak Stranger Things. A peaceful and nostalgia tinged track that even at over four minutes didn't do much to annoy.
Next up is 'First At The Accident' that followed a very similar groove. Very similar to track one, but with more emotive feelings to it; again, a chilled and nostalgia summer vibe to it all.
Halfway through and it is the turn of 'Sh*t In The '80s', which to my lack of supreme surprise was another nostalgic throwback. A steady synth based drum beat throughout had me imagining roller skating, children cycling, and people enjoying times at the beach. The perfect summer day conjured up and stuffed into a song.
Finally, it is the turn of the titular 'Sail & Wreck'. This one started with a more modern beat, though at its heart its shares much of the same DNA.
It was hard to dislike Sail & Wreck. The dreamy sounds of yesteryear were indeed very chill, and easy to let wash over you. Maybe not the most varied of sounds to be found, but nonetheless was the perfect accompiment to living life and making memories, which like the sound of the EP itself, in time will be remembered with nostalgic fondness. Sail & Wreck is Aiming's second EP and is out now.
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Justin (Leonardo Nam - Werewolf by Night) and Ana (Madeline Zima - The Hand That Rocks the Cradle) have gone to a couples retreat in the wilderness of Finland on the insistence of Ana's best friend, Harper (Kimberley-Sue Murray - Crimson Peak), who is also going with her partner. The retreat is run by Tiina (Milla Puolakanaho), the hippy-like leader of a cult who worship a local nature God known as Lampa. At her retreat she helps those who are struggling in their relationships, using her perspective on life. Justin is fully on board for this, but Ana really doesn't want to be there. Tiina's religion is a sexual one, and lust soon permeates the air. With the guests all giving into their carnal desires, they also begin to hallucinate evil looking doppelgangers with glowing golden eyes. It seems that Tiina has something sinister in mind for Ana in particular, something that involves the rebirth of Lampa into a physical form.
The first half of this 90 minute horror was very slow. It was made up of various couples having sex or otherwise just getting naked at the drop of a hat (the film includes full frontal male nudity, plus lots of breasts and butts if that is your thing). The only visible signs of horror came from the golden eyed hallucinations and a bucket-load of CG birds. There was the idea here that anyone who dies literally transforms into a bird. With birds being my favourite animal, it was hardly the stuff of nightmares imagining that happening. It also didn't help that the many flocks of birds were entirely CG, it never felt like there was a single real bird in the entire film. Other bad looking CG came in the form of digital looking fires, with one mini-explosion in particular looking like something from a made for TV movie. There were some cool looking kill scenes with practical special effects used, such as someone stabbed to death with a stag antler. There was plenty of blood, alongside possessed people, and of course the fake computer birds.
The acting style could be wild at times, with Tiina in particular walking a tightrope of manic veal that occasionally fell off into outright absurdity. The wide eyes and over the top grin could come across as silly rather than someone full of religious fervour. Elsewhere, Justin irritated with his near permanent horny grin, while Ana made for a miserable protagonist who never came to be a character I remotely cared about. There wasn't a single likeable character, always a bad thing when you are meant to be rooting for the lead.
An indie film with less than ideal CG effects, but it still looked cohesive on screen. The story was basic and a little bit meandering, but the look of the lake and surrounding woods was a nice one, creating some atmosphere. The best part of Love Is the Monster was the rustic sounding score. Lots of simple drums, and the occasional inclusion of deep throat singing. This primitive sound really added to the vibe of the folk horror, making for the best part of the whole.
Despite being a serious horror, the cartoon-like antagonist with her exaggerated performance, coupled with the ever present digital birds, had me struggling to take this seriously. A budget Midsommar the setting and the music may have been on point, but the characters and more vitally the story, came to be lacking. Love Is the Monster became available to rent or own in the U.S.A on June 23rd, exclusively on Amazon Prime Video.
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In an alternate Earth that saw Russia and the U.S.A engage in a nuclear war (and America very much coming out on bottom), the continent is now a nuclear wasteland that has came to be known as 'The Geiger Lands' There is no government anymore, instead various warlords have rose up to rule the various states. In this land there is a special gameshow broadcast illegally that the whole nation adores. 'Try Not to Die' sees contestants plucked out of the remains of society at random and taken to a custom built arena full of deadly traps, where they are hunted by vicious killers. These maniacs, referred to as 'slashers' are loved enough that they have become household names, and stars in their own right. For the latest episode of the show, one of the unlucky contestants is Dawn, a determined young woman who intends to not only find a way to survive the rigged game, but also to find a way to somehow reach the producers box and kill the show creator; warlord Marisol.
Having read the prequel, I eagerly awaited the arrival of Razortooth, but she turned out to be far more of a side character here, appearing at around the halfway point of the roughly 300 page book. I love killer gameshows but initially I can't say I was impressed with this one. The contestants were quickly dropping like flies, while the action pausing for ad-breaks (that get their own mini-chapters, much like with the prequel) led to a frustrating feeling of stopping and starting. I then had the realisation that I was little better than the rabid audience, wanting to see blood and violence at the expense of everything else. Once I began to appreciate this wasn't going to play out as a proper episode of the show, and followed the format more of rebelling against the very idea of it, that I became much more invested in the story. The actual gameshow makes up most of the novel, and it was neat that both the contestants and production staff get their own little subplots going on. Best of the staff parts were jaded gameshow host, Mark Winters. He was a very interesting character, turning to alcohol to be able to believably play his part of jokester host, when in reality he is horrified by it all. I enjoyed these frequent cutaways to him and his interactions with other staff, such as showrunners, and the producers themselves. My very favourite part of the novel was a found footage style section that saw two hapless camera-men forced to head into the cells where the killers are kept, after one of the contestants is abducted by one of the slashers.
From the very start, Slashvivors! is a wild ride, never dull, never lacking in extreme violent action. This was a brutal world where life is so cheap that many people dream of being able to get murdered by their favourite slasher.
Where most of the contestants are blank slates; just existing to be killed like Star Trek 'redshirts', the slashers were full of personality, and became the highlight. From a homicidal Abraham Lincoln kill-bot, to the cannibal - Charming Charles, mutant Denny the Killer Clown, and psychotic child, Abadonna - these killers were so varied and so much fun to read about. Of course, Razortooth eventually enters the story, and having read her origin story made the character better here. It was also cool to see other characters from the prequel also appearing in roles here.
There were moments of extreme violence, the use of a cheese-grater on a limbless victim's face for instance, and someone who was forced to eat their own genitals! The world was sadistically cruel, reflected very much with what happens throughout the story.
Slashvivor! went along at a blistering pace, Dawn was a decent protagonist, with a good story progression. I liked the use of flashbacks to reveal more about some of the characters, such as the origin story for warlord Marisol.
After a start that I was unsure of, I quickly got into the thrilling story, becoming hooked. This was one of those novels where I had a genuine bittersweet feeling reaching the end, I wanted to stay with these characters more. Slashvivor! was a fantastic novel, well worth reading.
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There is a brutal serial killer on the loose in New York, with the masked killer's choice of victim being winners of beauty pageants. Meanwhile, Karen (Jasmin Flores - Beaster Day: Here Comes Peter Cottonhell) is determined to make a career out of winning beauty pageants, much to the annoyance of her hen-pecked and sexually frustrated husband, Ted (Scott Bolger - He Sees You When You're Sleeping). With the killings benefitting her goals, Karen becomes well known in the media, loved and hated in equal measure. When the serial killer is caught, Karen must look to her own skills to continue to be on top of the pageant game.
It became increasingly clear just how much A.I is used here to tell the story. To begin with I didn't notice it too much, I enjoyed the scenes with the killer, and the ridiculously violent and unrealistic way victims were torn apart in geysers of blood. After the killer is stopped though, this falls into a troubled and ultimately dull middle section that seemed to go on forever. It made the picture lose the momentum it had built up to that point. The use of A.I may have been used with a tongue in cheek approach, but it took over so much of the movie that it felt authentic scenes were few and far between. Overhead shots of the city were fine, but the many, many scenes of identical looking crowds of people really overstayed their welcome. It was a bit amusing at first how obvious it all was, but these lengthy parts soon led to extreme boredom, making the 100 minute movie really drag. Visually this had a soulless look to it, and in terms of the plot, not much was really going on. The heavy A.I use ruined the film, with about 80% of the movie having that slightly uncomfortable and artificial look to it. While likely intended as a joke to create a 'so bad its good' type vibe, it fails at this and just becomes bad, with my patience wearing thin. You can have the most disgustingly violent and gory scene ever, but with that A.I look, it did nothing for me other than to make me roll my eyes.
The main characters were not bad. I thought Ted was decent, and special mention goes to the two detectives, with Harris (Phillip Green) and his counterpart having some hilarious scenes together where they have meandering conversations that almost felt ad-libbed. Those scenes were the very best parts of Karen the Beauty Queen Butcher, but few and far between in a sea of terrible looking A.I generated crowd scenes. The humour was ok at times, and it had some current-news jokes thrown in, such as a few referring to modern day folk-hero/alleged CEO killer, Luigi Mangione.
The first twenty minutes or so I didn't think this was bad, I had an early review score that was much higher than what I eventually decided for this. The utter tedium of the middle soon had me desperately wishing for the film to end, it just dragged and dragged. Not completely terrible, the actors were fun in their roles, but there wasn't much actual things happening here, making for a vapid and often pointless experience. Karen the Beauty Queen Butcher is currently streaming on Amazon Prime, with it coming to TubiTV and Fandango in the first week of July.
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Elena (Jimena Bilsup) and boyfriend, Joaquin (Rolando Breme - 1974: The Possession of Altair) have recently moved to a new apartment in the middle of a bustling Mexican city. The film begins with them preparing to go on a vacation to visit Elena's mother. It is just before they leave that they discover something terrible. A deadly virus that had originated in Europe has made it to their country, and now the whole city appears to be over-run with victims; people who have died and returned to life as flesh-hungry ghouls. Joaquin wants to still travel to Elena's mums house, thinking it will be safer there, but Elena thinks maybe staying put is the best idea. The arrival of a suspicious stranger; Giovanni (Giovanni Gamba) creates an uneasy alliance, with the trio forced to work together to protect the apartment from being invaded by the hungry dead.
Together Till the End stays in the apartment location for about 99% of the film. The action only moves outside of it via Facetime video calls. Those parts were neat due to being presented in a narrow vertical format, as they would appear on a phone itself. Due to the relatively bland central location, there were also just a handful of characters, eight in total, most of which only made very minor appearances. Elena and Joaquin were likeable leads, with the later in particular standing out, due to being a flawed character. He is portrayed as a bit of a love-rat, but despite this, his character acts selfless and noble throughout the story. There didn't seem to be as much to Elena, she was decent enough but nowhere near as interesting. Giovanni was an interesting character, and while it was obvious that he may not be exactly who he claimed to be, he was a fun person to distrust, and the film makes no effort to hide his duplicity.
Being an indie film, there sadly were also just a handful of zombies shown here, roughly seven or eight in total over the course of the whole movie. At times this led to a bit of frustration as a viewer. In one scene, the couple are watching a news report on TV, but the camera is pointed from behind of it, so that you don't actually get to see anything. The same annoyance happens in a different scene where the couple are looking in horror out of their apartment window, but again nothing is actually shown, just some sound effects to suggest what is occurring. There are a bunch of action scenes, but nearly all of the violence is implied rather than shown, usually happening just out of shot. I get its the constraints of the budget, but it gave the film a bit of a slower paced feeling, especially in the meandering third act. I also felt the abrupt event that happened right near the end credits could have been handled a bit better.
Together Till the End was a decent indie zombie film. Far more drama than horror, this benefitted from some good dialogue, and I liked the occasional bit of dark humour thrown in. Personally I would have liked more ghouls, but regardless, this was a solid indie entry in the very crowded sub-genre.
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I think this takes place roughly six months after the events of Necromancer. Monster hunter, Wendy Markland has headed to Florida, though has noticed a car has been following her the entire way. Confronting the driver at a gas station, he introduces himself as Colm Pryce - a fellow monster hunter who brings with him terrible news. He tells Wendy that she is being hunted by a very powerful group of vampires who call themselves 'The Kindred of Malignity'. Their leader is Adolph Larson; a vampire so strong that he has powers rarely seen (such as being able to be outside during the daytime). Colm also tells Wendy that what makes this group more dangerous is that each time a member is slain, the remaining members inherit that dead vampires strength.
Vindicated was a great end to the trilogy. Where Necromancer was an almost stand-alone story, this one has ties back to both novels. Never the most capable or enthusiastic of monster hunters, Wendy is really shown to be on the back-foot here. There never seemed a single point in the novel where she is doing anything but reacting to the actions of her attackers. As antagonists go, The Kindred of Malignity were pretty cool. I loved that each member was given at least a little bit of backstory to their characters. This gave an almost Kill Bill feel of the unique gang members all out to get Wendy. While in peril and out of her depth, she is helped by the group never seeming to ever take her seriously as a threat. The vampires are either really inept, or the apparently super vampires are not that much more dangerous than the normal type, with them spending the entire book constantly underestimating Wendy.
The horror comes in three key ignition points throughout the story. Each time the group get in a battle with Wendy and Colm you could be sure of a thrilling read. Lots of gory decapitations of victims, and lots of extreme violence given to the paper tiger vampires. I zoomed through the 281 page novel, barely able to put it down. By this point in the series I was really hooked, liking protagonist Wendy despite her continuing off-putting narcissistic qualities of constantly admiring her own body. Being a Harper book, of course this heroine is a flawless beauty, something she is well aware of. There is some growth to be found in her character, with her leaving the book a very different person at book's end than she was at the start. This was a transition I hadn't expected.
Vindicated was a great finish to the story of Wendy Markland. I really liked how flawed and ultimately human she was. She gets emotional, she makes terrible mistakes both in her actions and her priorities, but she really grew as a character over the course of her three books.
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It begins with a serial killer, credited solely as 'The New Kid' (David Howard Thornton - the Terrifier series), heavily injured, after having taken a fatal blow from his final victim. As the killer slumps to the ground, he begins to lament his fate, and his sadness at not being able to kill anymore people. It is then that he hears a strange voice from a supernatural entity (Bill Oberst Jr. - The Man in Room 6, 3 From Hell). This voice offers the dying man a chance to kill again, all he has to do is give himself over to the being and give him his soul.
Meanwhile, high schooler Isaac (Idris Veliu in his film debut) has been having a tough time. Cursed with the gift of being able to see dead people since a young age, people around him find him weird, with even his own mother beginning to think her child needs psychiatric help. One day, the entity contacts Isaac also, interested in his special gift, it promises him great power should he also give himself over to it.
I really enjoyed this indie horror. For a change, I thought the main protagonist was a great character. Sure he is troubled, but at heart it is obvious he is a genuinely decent person, something that comes across with his interactions with other characters, such as the respect he shows for his wholesome father. Isaac's girlfriend Katharine (Lexi Graves) and younger brother play their parts well, but it is school trouble maker James (Nick Theurer - The Bell Keeper) and his gang who were the highlights. The running joke of James vehemently denying he is a bully despite all the evidence to the contrary somehow never wore out its welcome.
Thornton is great as the red hoodie wearing ghost killer. It was cool to see the actor in a speaking role, and with his way of talking, he came across like a Freddy Kruger style wise-cracking villain. This was fitting as the story of The Dead Place did feel a bit familiar to A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge. This killer is missing from the film for much of the first act, but when he finally reappears he was fantastic to watch. I loved the gleefully evil way he spoke, and his manic ever present grin. The practical effect of his distended jaw looked ok, but was certainly better than some less than real looking CG blood sprays, but outside of that, there was a good amount of blood flowing. There was also a decent amount of kills, including some lovely looking throat slits.
The story kept my attention throughout, leading up to an unexpected finale that seemed to set up a sequel, rather than give any closure to this film's over arching plot, a minor annoyance.
The Dead Place can be a little rough around the edges at times, as can be seen with some of the less impressive effects. I did think both Thornton and Veliu were great in their roles, and of course it is always a pleasure to hear the voice of Oberst Jr. If a sequel does get made, then I will be interested to see the direction this goes in.
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Much like its predecessor, the story here has you setting out to discover the source of the evil responsible for unleashing hordes of monsters upon the land. Starting off in a village, you choose your character and leave, the assumption being that a vampire is the cause. Of course, exactly the same as before, the big joke is that there isn't a single vampire to be found anywhere in the game.
Again, this is presented with a charming pixel-art style. Indeed, the monster and character models are lifted whole-sale from Survivors, looking even more basic and janky due to being blown up to a larger size to fit the first-person card battling. Each stage follows a familiar rogue-like pattern. Defeating enemies with your card attacks gives you XP gems, which then level-up your character, each level giving you the option of three rewards. There are different attack types, buffs, and special abilities to add to existing cards. Each card has a value, usually between 0 and 3, these allow you to build up combos, with each subsequent card in line getting more and more powered up. You traverse maze like levels in first person, dotted around are candles to break for gold and other boons (gold being used at the village to buy new heroes at the tavern, buy permanent upgrades at the shop, and later, adding ability slots to cards at the blacksmiths). Levels are usually made up of five floors, with the exit to each floor being guarded by a boss enemy whose charging attack can be quite painful to receive if not countered.
Story-wise, of course this is very basic. Levels are identical to Survivors, woods, an enchanted library, milk factory etc. It is very addictive and I always felt I was making progress, each run taking anything up to an hour to get through. I found it fun to play both with and without podcasts as background accompiment. It was also lengthier than you might expect, my final play time being over 24 hours! Similar throughout, I still rarely got bored playing this, and by the time the end credits rolled it just about hadn't outstayed its welcome.
Vampire Crawlers, much like its protégé was crack in the form of a game. Highly addictive and with a good sense of progression, this was very much worth playing. Even better, it is currently on Xbox Game Pass.
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